i theorize that i feel different and am frustrated because of a change in my body. there is definitely change. certain muscles are relaxing like they haven't been able to in many years. i can sit and lean a certain way and it causes a fat roll above my obliques. i was too stiff to get that lean before. all this change (do to stretching and maybe initially and continually do to working at the store. being up and at'm 5 times a week for 5-7 hours) makes it easier for me to relax and enjoy certain things.

however, this relaxation makes it harder for me to 'get up' especially in the morning. i come to work and i feel convinced i'm not supposed to gear myself up.