on wearing a mohawk

drunk friends' limbs dangle limp off half-gotten-into recliners and etc. when shawn comes home from the bar at 3 am. and here's the thing: if you don't want to get a mohawk hair-do, never mention that you do.

yeah, i could have just worn a red hat into public that next morning in the shady side of pittsburgh, but let's just see what it's like to have a mohawk, i thought. and plus there was encouragement from steve.

i imagined it would be like wearing a shirt that just said 'HOLY FUCK' big and clear across its front. everyone's going to look, but also, and then quickly, everyone's going to look away. plus you gotta watch for getting into a bunch of fights.

one thing i've thought a ton about but never ended up getting on this blog here was that FX show Black. White. that show caused me so much anger and worked-uppedness. but a major theme (or argument) was about prejudice being seen more because it was expected more from the black family. so when the white guy would go out in black make-up, he'd see less. or so that was his reasoning. and although i felt that the white guy was the least open-minded, i still feel that this is partially true. [note the colbertness]

so, here i go first thing, to test out my new 'look-at-me' style. a nice bad move got me off on the wrong foot as i pulled into a parking lot that was apparently one i wasn't allowed to park in. so here's a question: was the old guy who was gaurding the lot's 'hey bud, this is private parking' meaner because i was wearing a mohawk, or not? well, that's what i was analyzing right after he said it and so instead of naturally just telling him 'oops, my bad,' i instead just stood there looking all mean in my mohawk and thus creating a whole lot of tension. i realized why the situation got how it did but i didn't know how to get out of it. once i imagined i was a badass and imagined that he took me as one, i couldn't help but act like one. i tried to say things i'd normally, nicely say, but instead it came out gruff and incoherent - so i just turned and walked back to my car a little dismayed and disgruntled.

then there's the whole quick story about how i then tried to leave that parking lot the wrong way what with my beckoning back to the car pulling in in front of me that i just wanted to get around him and then with me realizing afterwards that i wasn't following the arrow system in the lot (which i don't think you legally have to follow anyway) but then i was still sensitive to my badass perception and so i was trying to do things right and so i started backing up to turn around but that old guy guard started waving his arm as if now i was just fucking things up worse and that i might as well just keep going. but i didn't. i said something like this is just too weird now, and went to find some other spot to park.

so, a little frazzled, but steve sees a spot and so i try to square myself around four blocks to get back to it and in the process a guy pulls up to me and lowers his window.

'this is a one way street bud.'

i look at him and wonder if he's being more of an asshole because i have a fucking mohawk. therefore, i only end up managing, 'is that right?'

so, haha, he just says, 'yeah it is, so uh, just be very careful' and he drove off.

cuz there's no fucking way he's telling that guy with that mohawk to obey the rules or anything. he's just one man, how's he gonna take down my whole kind. he's not going to. he's going to just put his window up fast and drive off.

so, the above happened all in those first few minutes of people seeing me with a mohawk. completely defeated, i force a chinese fire drill on steve and allow him to do some parking to finally meet nathan to begin the trip south.

i thought i would wear a bandana (as i'd before) while hiking the trails, but instead, again, the mohawk prevailed as my uppermost feature. good experiences became the norm eventually as i got to surprise people with preemptive 'hellos' 'good day's' and 'hiyas'. people enjoyed it. sure, there were a few quick looks back down, but i blame them on me. i mean, i wouldn't hold the gaze of a mohawk if he didn't first engage me with politeness. but everyone wants to be able to say that they were once friends with a guy with a mohawk and so it was kind of fun.

i enjoy being nice to people much more, when they least expect it