HER RAY!
i just felt like saying that.
ha, i swear when i asked merrium webster how to spell a word it responded 'the word you entered isn't even in the dictionary.'
haha, isn't even.
haha extra, apparently it's still a word though, so like i'm bigger and better than the dictionary.
ah, like a cold drink.
no. wait. i've been known to say, 'what kind of temperature is it.' or those that know me claim.
wow, when i don't want to have a conversation, the person talking seems so fucking stupid. of course when i blink back into real listening, they're nice and making sense. and so i sometimes waver between wanting to indirectly end the conversation with a rude 'no comment' and actually just getting through the conversation. luckily this time i saw to the end of the conversation and realized i didn't want her walking away uncomfortably. well, i wavered between wanting this and not wanting it. it's just because i'm awful feeling today. and i know it's wrong to listen to people with disgust in my intentions but there's something to say about the kinds of wild hate my mind can come up with even when someone's just saying and doing normal things. if i want it, you can look so stupid. i don't want it. i don't want to know it exists. but when my muscles ache and life is a constant chore you just want over, then telling me about the trim on some bench/chair set, really makes me wonder if you're the one being rude even though it's probably just because you can't read my thoughts but i like to think that if i'm feeling as annoyed as i am you should be able to read my feelings. am i that good at fucking hiding how sick of you i am? ah, maybe it's still my good will that pulls me from that disaster. i'm not sick enough to lose the battle. the battle that is you leaving uncomfortably or not. such are the battles i wage from this perch. if only being a hero was easier
ha, i swear when i asked merrium webster how to spell a word it responded 'the word you entered isn't even in the dictionary.'
haha, isn't even.
haha extra, apparently it's still a word though, so like i'm bigger and better than the dictionary.
ah, like a cold drink.
no. wait. i've been known to say, 'what kind of temperature is it.' or those that know me claim.
wow, when i don't want to have a conversation, the person talking seems so fucking stupid. of course when i blink back into real listening, they're nice and making sense. and so i sometimes waver between wanting to indirectly end the conversation with a rude 'no comment' and actually just getting through the conversation. luckily this time i saw to the end of the conversation and realized i didn't want her walking away uncomfortably. well, i wavered between wanting this and not wanting it. it's just because i'm awful feeling today. and i know it's wrong to listen to people with disgust in my intentions but there's something to say about the kinds of wild hate my mind can come up with even when someone's just saying and doing normal things. if i want it, you can look so stupid. i don't want it. i don't want to know it exists. but when my muscles ache and life is a constant chore you just want over, then telling me about the trim on some bench/chair set, really makes me wonder if you're the one being rude even though it's probably just because you can't read my thoughts but i like to think that if i'm feeling as annoyed as i am you should be able to read my feelings. am i that good at fucking hiding how sick of you i am? ah, maybe it's still my good will that pulls me from that disaster. i'm not sick enough to lose the battle. the battle that is you leaving uncomfortably or not. such are the battles i wage from this perch. if only being a hero was easier
on a whim, chad was marco @ 2:17 PM
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