so, i'm happy about things

amazingly so. and i could exaggerate this into a post. but it's really not appealing to me. i feel ashamed when i show off, and writing about how good i feel would feel like that. i don't like this about me. it helps keep my dreams suppressed. so, i don't like either option. but, it's good.

but, right, i still don't have a life, in the way that people look at having a life. but, i was certain it wasn't worth having, or would never come, if i wasn't first to this kind of point that i'm at now.

hahahaha, i'm exaggerating this into a post.

is it wrong somehow that i'm my funniest comedian. yes. somehow.

but, then, how else can you get through the boring parts.


definitely, more than three-fourths of the time that i tell someone my name, they hear it wrong. meaning i don't say it well enough. it's very weird. i usually get 'jack' or 'jed.' what i think this means about me, makes me think of my one co-worker and how she talks quickly and quietly. like no one ever listens to her, or more, maybe, like she only talks to her loved ones, and they understand her perfectly. but sometimes i just think 'chad' is a hard name to say.

oh, but since i'm happy about things (i've hit a point, where i measure that it's significant. and i've hit many in the last year or so. where my head stays pat in it's new condition for long enough that i know i can relax because it's become the norm) i see a change coming again in my posting habits. i hope i stay around here and evolve what and how i say, but it might take a while. i don't know what to say anymore.

but probably a little more today.