imagine an older man making weird faces
ok so i read a couple of paragraphs and...i don't know.
all i kept thinking was that i can almost relate with what is being said, but i can't relate in a 'that's so true' way. more like, some of what you're saying is some of what i've thought about. i guess one day i'll commit wholley to a certain world-view or personal-view of society, but i can't commit now. everyone i love holds me back; forces me to keep other possible future personal-world-views open. what if it came down to a decision between being true to yourself and love. i know you'll all say well then that wouldn't be real love if you couldn't feel true to yourself. and that's probably right. it's more like i'm sacraficing myself so that i don't hurt them. but this isn't what they would want or what i want, right. but now, ok, i see this clearly, but yet still can't adopt the 'our world is like this' view. any 'our world is like this' view. any 'our society feels as such' thing. you'd have to believe in the collected unconscious. and to do that you'd have to talk to a lot of various people, deeply.
ok, so what i'm saying says nothing about the cd, of course, but let's consider the cd and its review. a friend and i are sitting around listening to it. personally, i want to know how interconnected our minds are. so when i react strongly to a certain part of the song i think about why it is that i liked it. i'll turn to my friend and see if he liked that part as well. ok, he did. at least it seemed like it. or maybe he was just responding to my turning to him and expressing my enjoyment. he, perhaps was enjoying it overall, and so answered 'yeah this is awesome,' to my question, 'oh, that was awesome,' and maybe wasn't affected by that one part that i was. i realize that i liked that part for personal reasons, ones that couldn't have been the same for him. the fact of the matter is, though, that we were playing our parts in society by sitting there in enjoyment of this new, modern sound, song, event. we're up on our times and feel togetherness towards society's future. we belong. but, to me, my personal reactions seemed stronger and more important than just going with the flow and just enjoying it because we were supposed to enjoy it. i feel this weird draw towards people that fit right in with the way society is developing, but i can't join them. this suits me.
all i kept thinking was that i can almost relate with what is being said, but i can't relate in a 'that's so true' way. more like, some of what you're saying is some of what i've thought about. i guess one day i'll commit wholley to a certain world-view or personal-view of society, but i can't commit now. everyone i love holds me back; forces me to keep other possible future personal-world-views open. what if it came down to a decision between being true to yourself and love. i know you'll all say well then that wouldn't be real love if you couldn't feel true to yourself. and that's probably right. it's more like i'm sacraficing myself so that i don't hurt them. but this isn't what they would want or what i want, right. but now, ok, i see this clearly, but yet still can't adopt the 'our world is like this' view. any 'our world is like this' view. any 'our society feels as such' thing. you'd have to believe in the collected unconscious. and to do that you'd have to talk to a lot of various people, deeply.
ok, so what i'm saying says nothing about the cd, of course, but let's consider the cd and its review. a friend and i are sitting around listening to it. personally, i want to know how interconnected our minds are. so when i react strongly to a certain part of the song i think about why it is that i liked it. i'll turn to my friend and see if he liked that part as well. ok, he did. at least it seemed like it. or maybe he was just responding to my turning to him and expressing my enjoyment. he, perhaps was enjoying it overall, and so answered 'yeah this is awesome,' to my question, 'oh, that was awesome,' and maybe wasn't affected by that one part that i was. i realize that i liked that part for personal reasons, ones that couldn't have been the same for him. the fact of the matter is, though, that we were playing our parts in society by sitting there in enjoyment of this new, modern sound, song, event. we're up on our times and feel togetherness towards society's future. we belong. but, to me, my personal reactions seemed stronger and more important than just going with the flow and just enjoying it because we were supposed to enjoy it. i feel this weird draw towards people that fit right in with the way society is developing, but i can't join them. this suits me.
on a whim, chad was marco @ 2:17 PM
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At 5:55 PM,
chad was marco said…
right. i wish i could be as clear-headed as you, heh. that's part of the reason i have this blog, is to try to get more clear-headed. for example, i knew why i didn't agree with what i was reading, but i had trouble generalizing it. thus my seemingly intentionally difficult explanation. hmm, or not. i think i'm just lazy. oh, i'm sure that's it now. i'm too lazy to just take a few seconds to write it clearly. ok, but it's more than that even. when i take a few seconds to try to be more clear, i get frustrated and end up voiding whatever i was writing. i'm doing it right now. and then i basically just stop the idea in its tracks.
At 6:25 PM,
Anonymous said…
i concur with shawn... music reviewers always seem so goddamn pretentious, and pitchfork writers are ten times more pretentious than your average writers. david cross did a really funny parody of pitchfork reviews the other week, actually. they had it up on their site for a while.
that said, funeral is an awesome album. i feel like i don't appreciate it for all those deep reasons though... i like it because it's such a badass album to turn up really loud and drive around to.
anyway, i liked what you said:
"i feel this weird draw towards people that fit right in with the way society is developing, but i can't join them. this suits me."
that's how i feel like hipsters, i think. i find them so fascinating/attractive, but i could never be one (though, the arcade fire is a very hipster album to own).
At 6:32 PM,
chad was marco said…
"i like it because it's such a badass album to turn up really loud and drive around to"
haha, there you go.
haha, why don't they review it that way. 'light up a smoke and get in your car. the new cd-x album is out and iiiit plaaaays LOUD (loud) (loud) (loud)'
At 1:24 PM,
chad was marco said…
but i don't really want to be with them. that's why it suits me. i guess it's not really a 'weird' draw. it's only natural to try to fit in. maybe since my initial response was to think the draw seems weird makes me weird.
you may think you want to because it looks fun and normal and easy but you've tried it i imagine and it doesn't suit you. if it bugs you enough you can always try again, take steps that would lead you there again and then you would know for sure if you really didn't like it or if maybe the reason you don't have that is because of something you don't like about yourself. maybe you couldn't be with that normal type of group because within groups there are somewhat clearly defined roles people play. you didn't want to be defined. however, now you may be ready to sacrafice a little humility take the blows that used to seem demeaning but now may seem necessary to keep the group running smoothly, and you won't take it to heart. Or, you would see you like things how they are because you want to be understood at a deeper level and won't compromise specific truths for some general, old fashioned summer fun. Basically, I'm describing me and pretending it's you in this comment, so don't take it personally if it doesn't fit.
Everybody brings everything back to them. Know this and know the meaning of life. and remember that, I...was the one that told you.
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